I Can't Do This Anymore.

I have finally gotten to my breaking point. I'm the one out of us three.. that tends to wear my heart on my sleeve. I have the WORST luck with guys. But i was always taught to NEVER give up.. & keep striving for what you believe in. & I believed that I can find a guy that can make me happy. Is that so wrong of me to believe in ? LOL. Geesh. I'vve believed & tried to attain this for years now. Everytime i find one.. not long after.. they turn into the "Same Story, Diff Guy" Scenario. ! But then i realized.. this isn't me GIVING UP ! This is me being strong enough to put a stop to this. I want to find a good guy soo bad .. that i tend to make the worst guys look good to me. They'll be great on the surface, but my BFF's will alwaysss tell me they're bad news. :/

I invested nearly 5 years into one guy from highschool. Till this day it's the same shxt. "HER". Then i recentley met this guy that seemed almost near freaken perfect !! Invested about 8 months into it.. But same problem. a "HER". there seems to ALWAYSSSSSSS be a "HER" with me.. i swear LOL ! Its a conspiracy :/ lololol.

the fact that i HATE confrontation, especially w. someone i care about.. when they do those stupid little lies.. i let it "pass over" dumb right ? because then the situation gets deeper & deeper. I realized i shouldnt even care to have a guy in my life.. that obviously doesn't care about me enough to be honest with me. Honesty is the biggest form of respect. If someone respects you, they will be loyal & honest. In this case he wasn't. So why care about someone that doesnt respect you ?! But with the 5 year situation.. that's just one that (im sorry to say) .. but i feel like im about to finally give up on. My previous "anonomyous love letter" was to him.. so i shouldnt repeat everything. He knows how i feel about him.. & if it was meant to be.. it would've been.. right ? :(

I'm just exhausted.. my heart is tired & lazyy at this point. I have no more tears to cry.. & no more love to give. Im DONE ..

I am a STRONG, Independent young LADY. & I Deserve to be treated as such. with respect & Loyalty. I will now have very high standards. LADIES !! KNOW YOUR WORTH ! DO NOT EVER SETTLE FOR LESS. Do not become one of thosee unstablee depressed girls. LOL Man up & just make that paperr ! LOL. anyway.. When my time comes.. i will find my "knight & shining armor". LOL May take longer than others.. but i know when it does.. it will be well worht it & it will be one LUCKYYY MAN ;).

Hugs&Kisses.Sammy*